Monday, November 21, 2005

Worrying Future.

ugh. i'm beginnig my post with 'ugh' for the second time today. spent the whole dya on the computer downloading and installing stuff . i'm still pondering whether or not to install windowblinds and stuff. oh, i'm so content downloading stuffs!!

but there's still somethings that are bothering me. stuff like, my external hard drive just broke down!! the only important stuff in there is the family photos which i have been saving for like, years. grace almost went berserk when she heard!! thanks to ah chiu, he explained to grace that it's not my fault at all and it breaks down by itself. save by the bell! i'm worried that all the pictures might get washed away after it's being sent for repair (hopefully recovery)! and worse, my porn collection is in that drive! you might be having disgusted looks at ur desktop right now as you're reading this, but, yes, i am only human and i used to watch porn. let me emphasise on this, USED TO!! it was kept there long ago and i never bothered to open them nor was i bothered to delete them. honestly, it's kind of sad to be deleting your porn collection but i never watched them since ages. so, it's still stuck in there, and it's gonna blow my cover soon!! oh, i just hope they can salvage the pictures and delete everything else!! my, oh my.

another mind-bothering thing is my education. i stumbled upon some anonymous person's blog and by reading it's posts, i could easily tell he/she is a malaysian blogger. well, by the usage of "LAH" in he/she's posts, it's unmistakably malaysian. and he/she says he/she's attending form 4 tuition already. i'm not sure about most of the guys out there, but i'm kinda laid back and relaxed here. i mean, i really am spending wasted days. and i have not one tuition at all since after the PMR examinations!! i'm glad that i'm relaxing (one of my fave things to do) and just plain being lazy at home. but i'm worried about whether if i'd manage to catch up with the others when school re-opens!! i think most of them are busy studying their way off for next year and i'm like th eonly person in malaysia who's still not done enjoying freedom-after-exams yet!! i'm so lazy.

my only excuse most of time to make me feel better of the situation is to blame the society for being such "cowards" on catching up with the world's development. in hokkien, i call it "KIASU"!! parents are so afraid of losing to their neighbour's children that they keep forcing them to attend tuition classes!! it's so infuriating to me. i mean, let the kid walk by himself, would ya?? parents!! i thank god for not having parents like these!! but i can't put all the blame on the parents, peer pressure is also to be blamed. you're so being looked down by society if you don't manage to get high degrees and stuff. i'll always remember the words of Martin Jalleh "PHD = Permanent Head Damage"!! it's so true!! having high degrees or diplomas or whatever you call it (oh, i'm so not good at this) doesn't mean you're educated at all!! has the society forgot about moral values?? what about, discipline, respect, self dignity, love and etc?? where has this all gone to?? now, that's what i call EDUCATION!! to think it all again, academic excellence is still the cause of negative social cases. with the lack of moral values and only the formula and stuff memorised from the books, this negativity is still on the loose!! *sighs* at the end of the day, when i look back at this, it only remains as my thought. and i'm most of the time, caugt up by the society also. i still gotta attend tuition and work hard to get a job, don't i??

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