Chinese New Year '08 - Day 1.

You know, I've always associated my camera with working - when I'm prepared to sweat as a result of going all out to various angles and when fun is sucked the hell out of the event. For me, at least. Well, good pictures calls for sacrifices, don't it? This time around though, I figured I was going to have fun and record it at the same time. I mean, c'mon, all those new clothes and accessories and gay spirit were worth capturing by itself. Of course, given the circumstances, I had to forgo the picture quality and the above-mentioned, angles. And that was exactly what I did. All I did was take off the photographic self in me, and slipped on the regular compact camera / cam-corder persona (and a little bit of narcissism) and snapped away. Anything and everything. The best of all is, the photographs didn't turn out to shabby!


Surprising enough for me, as it may appear to you, considering I'm not the usual cam-whoring type, I've taken more pictures of myself (via cam-whore style) than I have ever did before this. Of course, most of them had other people in it standing by my side - the same narcissists of the season, I suppose. Still, I guess you can call it a-spur-of-the-moment thing, seeing that I only took out my camera because I was in love with the lighting of my 3rd grandaunt's (the lady in red in the above photo who's being kissed by her husband) house by that time of the day. Which was exactly how everything started to take off from holding up the camera and pointing it towards me and the person beside, to group shots and family portraits! Yeap, the camera could be a dangerous possession, capable of bringing out the narcissists in people.



And let me tell you, holding my camera and pointing it towards myself isn't easy. It's not like it weighs as light as 2 pieces of credit card stacked together (isn't that how thin things get nowadays?). Every picture I took, I risked dropping my camera with my stubby little fingers and shaky hands. Also, as you can see, I've found this new way of putting all these great photos together, and posting them up. It doesn't tell a story or whatsoever but I find it more appealing than posting them singularly, shot-by-shot. Plus, I'm experimenting with a load of stuffs right now, so disregard the amateurish touch of things. Hey, at least, it's a far better improvement than last year's Chinese New Year! Indeed, I found myself smiling all the way while scrolling through the photos. And below is my favorite shot of the day which was taken by jie.

L-R : Ai Ai, Adrian, Edmund, me and Carina.

Oh, and do watch out for Day 2 soon!

Kitchen Tales.

Ok. So I've been lying. Partially. A tiny bit.

All those time I've mentioned that I can barely find time to indulge in my favourite activities and hobbies (take reading a novel for one) when my hands are practically filled with household chores, despite the fact that I may appear to have all the time in the world seeing that I'm still on my prolonged holiday study break. Well, the part about the having all the time in the world is fairly true and the part about the endless household chores... kinda. Of course, any systematic and organized suburban housewife will tell you that with a little proper planning (and less indecisiveness), she'll surely get some alone time where she'll get to indulge in her fantasies. Considering my domestic skills are slowly but steadily blossoming growing into the likes of foreign maids and cleaners hired by mothers of the Upper East Side community, added with my unquestionable planning ability, I do get some time off my shoulders.

Rare as they may come though, I still fill those little free times I have in the kitchen, enhancing my culinary skills. Surprising as it may sound, I do have an undying dream of becoming a chef one day. If there was a secret identity in everyone, mine would be the hopeful chef. It's more like a longing to want to be able to prepare meals for myself and others. Call me delusional in believing in myself, considering I own a pair of hands which works no better than my feet in holding a spatula. Mind you though, I've gotten comments by relatives that I've got the looks of a chef while they struggle to strike up conversations concerning me and my future if my camera wasn't in sight. Nonetheless, I usually dismiss those conniving compliments since they're usually associated with my extraordinary body size. Not that I'm not flattered when someone sparks a hope on that secret dream of mine.

So, whenever I'm done with my laundry, ironing, sweeping and mopping, dusting, dishes etc. etc., plus that sudden hunger pang as encouragement, I'd pick up the pan and the knife and spend about 2 hours of the afternoon in the kitchen, waltzing around while listening to E! News' cover on Britney's shameful breakdown on the television. I have to admit though, at this point, my cooking skills are only limited to frozen produced food, I still enjoy cutting up the lettuces and tomatoes for garnishing and the pure joy of having the liberty to handle your meal in whichever way you want. For an amateur like me, every session would just feel like an adventure. I mean, I barely know the As and the Bs in the kitchen and with no one watching my moves, I'm pretty doing things according to instincts, which, to be frank, wouldn't help me in cooking to even save my life. Exactly, how much is a pinch of salt? Cause I seem to be always giving it too much of a pinch. Don't even get me started on the burnt hashbrowns and overcooked tempura fish. Oh, we all learn from mistakes.

I guess all of these started back in December when jie was around and when we discovered the convenience of cooking with an oven (it saves you from all the oil splatter by a pan), instead of placing a pan over the stove and the many nights we were lazy to go out for dinner. To be thinking of it, that month itself, I've cooked up quite a lot of mid-afternoon snacks and quickie dinners with the oven and microwave. You know, we were busy teenagers with electronic cooking devices and no certain mealtimes. What did you expect? It's just a shame I didn't care much about recording anything back then. No photographs or whatsoever. I guess I was more into joining in the fun than recording it for later. We did manage to cook up pies (Banana Toffee Pie to be exact) on several occasions last month which totally broke my skepticism that Asians are incapable of making pie.

Caramel filling.

This shit is bananas. B.A.N.A.N.A.S!

Pie maker.

Pop it in the oven.

On several other occasions, just the other day, I mad myself some breakfast - consisting of hashbrown, scramble eggs, a burger (only edible after the second attempt) and a glass of juice. A week before that, I even made some mashed potatoes with a random mashed potato recipe taken off the internet. Oh, I do own a shameless amount of cooking recipes pages, bookmarked and just a click away for that cooking fix. And the mashed potato turned out ok, I guess. Let's just put it this way, it was left unfinished on the table till moss started growing over it on the third day which forced me to dispose it. I wouldn't take pictures of that, no way. Of course, those were the few things which I psyched myself to do almost on a weekly basis. Still, I wouldn't dare offer anyone a meal that I would prepare completely by myself. At least not till I'm ready. The occasional breakfast I prepare for the cousins and sister, well, that's just because I get feedback from them and they trust me enough to put the food I prepare into their mouth. Not that my cooking is bad, is it now?

Breakfast for one?

Can it look any more palatable?

On another note. Being the child on a study break and to be giving the misleading signal that I own all the time in the world (I kinda do for now), I've been helping mom a lot lately in the baking department, with the much anticipated Chinese New Year around the corner. This year, it appears that mom's coming full circle again, baking various traditional cookies and delicacy for the season after a lengthy two years hiatus since the death of kong kong. She's keen to do everything that she knows from the recipe book in her mind, result of many years of learning from women of the older generation. If I didn't know mom's real age, I'd say she pretty much came from the older generation as well. Like always, she's still amazingly capable of finding time to satisfy her baking cravings despite her being a full-time working mom. So far, we've already come up with three types of cookies for Chinese New Year - kueh kapit, kuih bangkek and ribbon biscuits produced usually in apoh's three bedroom flat. You'd be surprised by how these women are able to defy all odds and turn the flat into a confectionary of some sort just for the sake of keeping the traditional alive. The only thing is, mom refuses to go commercial with these cookies. She doesn't want to sell them. She still insists that they remain in the comforts of our own family and as gifts to visiting relatives during the new year.


Kuih Kapek from matrianklw on Vimeo.

And being in the boat that I'm in right now, I'm expected to be present on every baking session, dutifully helping out in whichever ways I'm needed and often, being caught up in the conversations amongst the women of the older generation. Sometimes, I'm even turned into the subject of conversation which could be pretty embarrassing. Besides that, mom has planned her schedule out this week nicely to make way for two more types of delicacy - the peanut cookies and sugared potato chips. To be honest, these names are quite tacky. The real pronunciations for all the delicacies (usually in the Hokkien dialect) sounds much better. Also, since this will be the 1st year after so long without akak's impeccable skills, mom would be fulfilling her duty as daughter-in-law and try to whip some traditional dishes for the celebration. Just imagine, 7-8 years without taking charge in the kitchen - she'll be needing all the help in the kitchen. Marketing itself would be a pain in the butt. Don't get me wrong though, she's a great cook, just a little rusty on the side.

But there I'll be the dutiful son by her side, carrying the marketing goods and chopping up carrots and cabbages (if I'm ever trusted upon these tasks). Until my time finally comes, I'll still be under the shadow of someone more experienced and no doubt, elder. I'm still working on gourmet meals, if you were ever wondering. Oh yes, and jie will be back this Sunday which only means another companion to the above chores.

My December.

About 5 months back, akak left the family - for good. Unfortunately, if you were looking for some juicy story regarding jeweleries, Bangladeshi workers or sick voodoo, you might be disappointed. No, I'm not going to uphold the average housewife legacy for bad-mouthing about maids, while hiding their own treatment towards them. Akak, however, left us for valid reasons, both agreeable and respectable to mom and dad, with great reluctance. I mean, she's been with us, managing the household for the past 6 or 7 years, friendships were formed, of course there'll be reluctance but to ask her to stay would be sheer cruelty and selfish for our part. She did go back 4 months earlier than her contract with us, though. Given the circumstances, we had to let her go. So, when she packed her bags and got on the plane, the family felt handicapped. It's been 6 years and none of us has done any chores for that length of a time (apart from that stint back in October '06 when she went back for a short while). To say we were rusty on our skills would be an understatement!

When she left, I was in the midst of my examination preparations, which mom intended not to interfere with chores. She always told me not to think so much about the chores and leave it to her. Back then, all I did was do the clothes, seeing that I was the only one whom akak passed down the knowledge of work the washing machine. Even that, mom was a tad bit worried that it might affect my studies, every now and then, offering to do the chores which we both know is impossible to ever get done with her working 8 hours a day. Let's be frank, working moms are not model housewives. Mom did do the ironing though (since neither dad nor I knew how to iron) while dad did the sweeping and the mopping. The household was manageable with me doing the weekly dusting of furniture and cleaning of the toilets. Naturally, it fell into a routine and we were getting used to it. Admittedly, there were times when things take a toll on us but I think we got through just fine. Even up to my exams, I didn't feel much pressure and the house was still liveable.

Come December, that's when things really got hectic. Jie was back for the holidays and she offered to help around the house. If you consider dragging me and dad along, cleaning the entire house for the entire first week helping, then she did help out alot. It was more like a mini house remodelling cum spring cleaning, instead of the weekly dusting. I don't blame her. To make the complete transition from having a maid do things for us for the past 6 to 7 years to a normal functional family with divided chores, we needed to reshuffle everything to our liking and understanding. After all, Christmas was near and we had to do our spring cleaning anyways. So we spent the first week at home, cleaning. Jie did take up the ironing as well, if I may mention. And when I thought December would be a breeze after that, amah comes running along having the fall and turning our just-settling-down lives upside down all over again.

Not that I blame her or anything (nobody wanted this accident to take place) but I've got to admit that it was the last thing any of us needed. The forth and back trips from home to the hospital just doesn't do the situation any good. Apparently, the grand old lady isn't dead yet. Wait, that was a little harsh of me - she hasn't passed away and according to some hocus-pocus Buddhism witchcraft, she's expected to live another extra 2 years, with her ailing condition. She finally moved back from the hospital into her own home and has been looked after by mom and dad ever since - we're talking about meal times, personal hygiene and medication - which pretty much puts another set of routines on my working parents, bounding them in their seats full of commitments. She isn't paralyzed or anything, just unable to do things by herself, especially when it comes to personal hygiene. Considering us being kids, we can't help out much in our part. Which made it no surprise that our family is the one who were usually late for gatherings, meeting and parties, given the schedule mom and dad constantly needed to plan around. So there, no death or whatsoever.

When things finally got a little settle down (when routines were familiarised) , jie and I became busy with last minute Christmas shopping. I know it seems here like we are horrible children who couldn't care less about other stuff at home at this point, but someone really needed to run the show and with mom occupied with her job and amah, who else was supposed to do the gift shopping, the wrapping and other monumental preparations for the season (albeit the mood being already dampen by the tragic fate of my dear grandmother). The show had to go on. So basically, we were running up and down malls, 2-4 times a week, a different mall each time for different reasons and by all means, let me tell you, shopping easily gets tired when you've been on your feet all the time, waltzing pass stores with shoes that aren't too comfortable to start with, and of course, the sheer thought of the parents slaving away in the day. With that sense of guilt swimming in me, I did constantly remind jie that we were bad children and we deserved to be punished, which she didn't retaliate to the remark in return.

To think about it again, the shopping wasn't easy task filled with stress-free moments. I mean, with parents trying to burst through your cellphones, insufficient cash flow and year end sales going on, shopping should be considered a hazardous activity (sometimes, we even skip lunch to fully utilize our time and save pennies!) which only manages to breed greed, self-absorption and fickle-mindedness. In other words, it only brings out the evil in me (and jie, no doubt)! Still, having the knowledge that there's still house chores to get back to after a tiring day of walking, gnawing at the back of my head most of the time should account for something good doesn't it? Surprisingly, I actually worry about not getting my laundry done or the dishes washed which usually results me in acting strangely during our one-to-many shopping sprees. Of course, after spending almost 8 hours at the mall, chores would be the last thing one would wanna go home to. Inevitably, I still return home and finish my chores (regardless of what time is it) and mind you, I do stay up at times to wait for the laundry.

In the midst of all that chaos, I still play host when cousins come over for sleepovers. Not only do I manage a big part of the family chores, I still need to ensure my guests have a splendid stay and that they don't notice the immense pile of laundry stacked up in our room, waiting to be ironed. Oh, and did I mention, I cook for my dear cousins as well, occasionally. Usually, it's breakfast as we normally eat-out for lunch (thank God!) but I do a little baking form time to time. And may I add, any new housewife would agree with me that cooking isn't an easy task, especially at the end of the meal when kitchen utensils pile obscenely in the basin. Whether it's just a reheat or a sauté, it still requires work. This season though, I've tried baking pies - banana toffee pie to be exact - ever since one of mom's friend passed jie and I the simple recipe. A good leap from the baking I did 2 years back, don't you think? Well, you definitely don't expect us to show up empty handed at parties and and family gatherings we've been invited to. It's a good way to get comments and feedback as well. If that's not getting my hands full, I don't know what is.

Plus, did I mention that I had to do all these with minimal amount of sleep. Hey, when the cousins are over, it's more like a who-can-keep-awake-the-longest-competition rather than a regular sleepover. If we weren't overdosing of midnight knickknacks (chips, pizza and candies), we were probably overdosing on movies or boardgames. Now, how much sleep do you think I can get out of these over-energized brats? Furthermore, I'm not the kind of wet blanket cousin who gets fussy over health issues and start giving them a lecture on living a healthy lifestyle. I'm more of the kind which allows them to go crazy if they wanted to and most of the time, joining in mindless adolescent games. After all, I don't stay young forever and it's the holidays! Oh, and the family gatherings on various occasions that keeps me awake till the wee hours, where could I possibly find sleep? Seriously though, I can still put my chores aside and have fun. Whoever said I was a serious no-nonsense freak. And I never get afternoon nap or anything like that, except for the 40 winks in the car and the mere ability to keep awake during church. Gee, have I sinned too much this Christmas?

Nevertheless, you still gotta admit that I am getting kinda good at this whole househusband role. As they always it's never to early to start and I will need all the training I can get to be more domesticated. My December was a helluva ride, that's for sure. At the end of the year, I was surprised myself that I'm still standing strong after everything (although getting unnecessarily cranky every now and then) that's happened. Realised that I barely have the time like I used to when I could sit and write all day in front of the computer, not the previous December or for the Decembers to come. Things have definitely changed around this household and I'm definitely armed with an excess baggage this new year. There's still a lot of getting used to and there's still a lot that needs to be done. In the meantime, I'm considering working and taking my driver's license by the end of this month and February, I hope - if things ever ease up enough for me to make time for a new commitment. I sure do hope.

Impending Death.

You know, the month of December isn't usually associated with bad news. At least not for me. The month of December has always been recognized as the month of giving, family ties, love, joy and all warm and fuzzy. It's Christmas, isn't it always been like that? Ever since I was a kid. December is the month of Christmas and also the last month of the year. Family get-togethers celebrating Christmas, choir practice, shopping, gift wrapping, attending parties, baking cookies and what not. All the pondering of another year coming to an end and of the things to come pretty much fills your heart with a tinge of nostalgia, not to mention, the Christmas wish list and New Year resolution. Sadly, all that is about to change. December this year would be my very first year of receiving news accepting the fact about the impending death of a grandmother. Which explains my occasional blanking out and brooding moments, as if to have reality sinking in.

It's almost a week now that she's been lying in the hospital, bed-ridden (after the fall at her own apartment), with a condition which neither looks promising nor improving, after suffering from a fall at her own home. Things happened pretty fast, coming in after one another, crashing on us like a speeding car onto a concrete wall. Diagnosis showed failing lungs as well, after the admission and through the hush talks from the adults, things will only get worse from there. See, the Chinese have this uncanny ability to recognize tell-tale signs when death is creeping up on a person, especially with the antics displayed by the person on the death bed like the calling of deceased relatives or mindless muttering or the lost of recognization of living relatives. As superficial as it is, I have seen the predictions coming pretty true myself, even without the doctor's word. Which is why there is no reason for me to elude myself about the inevitable death of amah. What with dad already asking whether if I have a picture of her, just as a subject of conversations.

Amah is losing consciousness by the day, slowly slipping away, that sometimes, she barely even recognizes the person visiting her. Not that she's on life support or anything, but by the looks of it (from the numerous back and forth trip from home to the hospital) her condition is undoubtedly deteriorating. Even as I'm typing here, she's resting in the hospital bed. She hasn't been eating well and most of the time, she's sleeping with the occasional strange utterance of matters which are unrelated or acting up like a child, so as mom says. Of course, I only get news of amah's behaviour from (as I mentioned before) the hushed conversations between adults which usually ends with words like "be prepared". That was also if I was eavesdropping - intentionally or not. In matters as such the adults still remain as adults, doing their best to protect us from the harsh realities of life, and of course, coupled with one or two popular beliefs.

In the Asian culture, these things are better left handled by the adults and as far as a child's responsibility is concerned, it only stretches as far as hopsital visits. We children pretty much remain in the household, just waiting for crucial news while we laze around like zombies with the news of an impending death of a family member hanging over our shoulders to harbour around. Although, jie and I do try our best to keep the atmosphere as light as possible with activities that can take our minds off things. Think Channel E! on the regular, with a few movies thrown in and catching up on a few episodes of TV series to help us steer our minds away. Sometimes, I even resort to excessive cleaning (of the house) to keep my mind fresh. I mean, it's the only few ways to keep me away from staring at the telephone for hours and jumping at every ring, all the time embracing myself for the news to come from the other end of the telephone. At this point, every phone call is such a source of intolerable fear, able to stop me dead in my tracks. I can get quite paranoid when the situation calls for it. You'll never know!

Other than that, jie and I will usually joke about death, as a general subject. It does help in facing the true fact, I guess. For the past week, we've even come up with calling amah the "grand old lady" awaiting for the right time to make her exit out of this world. After all, from our mental calculations and judging from the deaths trailing up the family tree, since our forefathers grandfather, this family has been quite notorious with their elaborate exits from earth. Their deaths usually catches us off-guard, dropping like a bombshell on us relatives, almost like dropping bombs in Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Take one incident for instance, we were rushed back home from our holiday in KL with the news of impending death of the late grandfather (which we did almost immediately!). Why should amah, known for liking the attention, pull something off any less elaborate right? I just hope I'm prepared when the time comes. Bad news knows no timing.

Furthermore, the death plague is around. The death plague was created by me, something I've given a name to when the number of wakes arises in town and when funeral homes are filled to the brink. It's weird, really. From my observations, it comes and goes like a season. One moment, funeral homes and undertaking companies seemed to be almost out of business and another moment, boom, there's not enough space to even hold wakes anymore. It's also obvious with the rise in the amount of wake which can be seen held at homes, extending to the roadside as we take a drive downtown. I've seen the death plague quite a number of times while growing up in town up till today. Observations are clear from the to and fro journey from home to the hospital. Even one of jie's distant friend passed away recently in a car accident, whose wake she attended yesterday, accompanied by me. And yes, the funeral homes were all occupied.

Well, with everything being said, I don't think December will ever be the same this year (or the years to come for that matter). Things are certainly looking more gloomy than I've ever remembered. Initially, I thought the exams were going to dampen the mood of December but I've been proven wrong. Amah is currently, as described by aunts, like a ticking time-bomb, getting everybody on the edge of their seats with its ticking. It may explode tomorrow, or the day after, or even tonight itself, only God knows. It's a painful process, but I'm certainly looking forward to God's graces to help me pull through this episode. Until it happens, jie and I are still going to keep asking, "Has the grand old lady made her grand exit yet?" Not that we are hoping, but it's strictly aimed at sugarcoating the reality. At least it helps, for me. Who knows what blow this impending death might bring.

Odd though, jie is still positive that it's not amah's time yet, constantly arguing that she can still hold on. Wonder what makes her says that.

Back for Christmas.

It's been a while, obviously, but I'm back. Yes, I did unanimously stopped myself from blogging about 5 months back for numerous reasons, examinations being one of them, with the occasional blog hop to keep myself updated. I do plan, however, to spill about the period of time I was away - not in one day, but in times to come. It might be quite a handful to handle given my sudden disappearance without prior notice and now, my sudden reappearance. I wouldn't attempt to fill you in or even dare think of an explanation (cause I definitely don't owe anyone one) to clear me from my charges. I mean, c'mon, I haven't been writing anything for so long (except for English or Bahasa Malaysia essays for the untimely exams), God knows my writing (and I mean, the one that I get to express my thoughts) skills have been reduced to mud. Plus, I was getting so unfamiliar with blogging that I even had trouble accessing into the blog - couldn't quite remember how things were with all those space in the mind used up to store facts for exams.

Bottom line is, I'm back. Not entirely though. Not yet, at least. But I'm back to assure myself that I'm still committed and I have not given up on this yet. There's been a lot going through my mind - the events I wanna blog about, the thoughts and opinions as well as issues happening currently in life. 5 months unable to actually talk wrench out about the strange revelation of events and thought provoking moments has quite taken its toll on me. Oh, the changes, the stories and the experiences! Unfortunately, as much as I wish it would, it doesn't come spluttering out from my mouth like emptying a can of baked beans. But I'm sure it'll come to me and when that happens, I'll have something to talk about, wouldn't I? I hope. Well, I think I'm done with the unspectacular monologue and get back to where I left off. No, not the durians and the dumplings. C'mon, it's December! The month of Christmas, my favourite time of the year!

This year, our tradition saw new light in the form of a new tree, after a year long of persuasion and pestering and after 8 years of being stuck with a 3 feet tall Christmas tree with stands made out of plastics and suffering from several fractured branches. Thank God! The joys of purchasing a new tree, made out of a completely different material, 5 feet tall and metal stands which gives the tree a promising and sturdy look, standing from the ground and not supported by some hideous antique chair. I guess this is the true side of celebrating Christmas in a country with a climate which disallows the operation of a scotch pine farm, or even with people much in anticipation into celebrating Christmas at all, for that matter. So tree hunting for this family of 5 was done at the nearby supermarket with the constant need for us to withstand skeptical gazes from passersby and where choices were left between different heights of manufactured trees. Oh, and it was raining outside too, at that time. Not that it brings much difference to in-store shopping.

Anyway, we managed to get the tree up by the 1st of December, only a day later than last year, if it wasn't for the crazy stuff that was taking place then, take my examinations for one. We did it with lesser people this year - only the three of us siblings and an additional apoh as a house guest. Well, to be honest, we were all tired by that time of the day, taking in account that we spent the entire day spring cleaning the all the corners of the house (there are still little crooks and crannies that still requires thorough cleaning) just to make it in time to put the tree up. No matter, the Christmas spirit and joy was overwhelming amongst us and we managed to have a knocking time completing the job. I mean, with the ongoing bickering about which ornaments to hang and where to hang and about how the tree was supposed to look like between three siblings and a grandma who is anything but shy when it comes to giving opinions, what's not to enjoy? And I think this is the best Christmas tree we've ever had since as far as I can recall.

Not so much bickering eh?

"I think this belongs here."

Let's see, the first Christmas tree we've ever had as a family (or rather, the first one I can remember now) was a white, completely-made-out-of-plastic, 3 feet tall tree. Oh, I used to loathe that one as a kid. In fact, I still don't quite grasp the entire idea of a white tree. It's bad enough we Asians need to live with plastic trees right out from the factory, I cannot understand why would anyone still want something that doesn't the least resemble a Christmas tree, let alone a tree covered in snow. It's ridiculous. I don't even know how mine got there - it was just there for as long as I can remember. Which is why dad bought us a new tree by the time I was 8, I think. A short little green coloured tree of the same height as the previous, recycling ornaments from the previous tree. I guess that tree outlived its live expectancy as it's still standing with a twisted branch or two and a broken leg, plastered together sloppily. Until this year, where we finally got what we wanted and so far, deemed as the perfect tree.

Lighted up!

Scotch pine tree.

Everything else on the tree was from last year's tree, expect the baubles and the bells since jie insisted on getting some new ornaments, seeing the sad state the present ones were in (the usual faded paint and gloss). Even the lights were from last year. We're still missing one thing though, a rightful star to be placed on the rightful branch of the tree. Nothing seems to fit - Nothing from the stores or the one from last year - that we're beginning to feel comfortable without it and was just considering about doing away with the star. Jie protested against the formidable angle perched on top of the tree and mentioned that one of the Barbie Dolls from her collection would do the job better than some sub-standard plastic angel with cheap clothing. And the bottom of the tree's been decorated with presents already, seeing that we had to cover up the unusually long legs of the new tree. Presents for the cousins and ourselves will be below the tree till Christmas comes. Speaking of which, I've still got a million things to get done by the time arrives - so much work, so much preparations.

Durians and Dumplings.

One of the best things I love about eating durians is the sweet lingering smell it leaves your finger with. It's so fragrant that I sometimes feel like licking the thumb again to see if I can still taste the sweet taste of durian from the night's before devouring of delicious durians. Seriously, I tell you, it can be a life saver at times - when there's a need of a serious wake-up call in the early hours of Mathematics or History class at school. A whiff of the strong smell from tmy fingertips (even if I accidentally brushed my face with it) is all it takes to get me awake, albeit with the sudden hunger pangs and craving for those deadly fruits in class. Amazingly though, there are still people who recognizes durians as the fowl-smelling fruit that only cause nauseousness! Really, I don't know what the fuss is all about to a certain few who squirms in uneasiness at the mere thought of the yellow flesh found under the thorny, green exterior of the fruit. I can quaintly recall someone old and wise (in the knowleldge of durian) saying that the art of eating durian requires passion and I'm beginning to think it might be true after all.

Want one?

I mean, the "stench" is one thing (that's fine by me!) but being afraid of the consequences of indulging in such pleasures of life (almost sinful!) served by Mother Nature herself is another thing that's almost intolerable by me in my little black book of Rules of Eating Durians. Oh, I've heard people saying that they're afraid to indulge because they're afraid of getting fat at the end of the day and I'll just roll my eyes in disapproval. Personally, I think it's bullcrap. I do admit, that consuming such delicacies in large quanitities might just result in undesirable body proportions but judging by the intake of a durian lover, I don't think it can hardly bring any affect to the average consumer, what else, be detrimental to your health. Let's be honest, when it comes to durians, either you love it or hate it. Period. No buts or conditions in between. Which is why I shot Grace a look of contempt when she hesitantly (and miserably) picked up the poor fruit with her finger tips, complaining about not wanting to get her fingers dirty and about her weight while trying her best to oblige mum. As I said, love it or hate it, it still requires passion to enjoy such sinful saccharine substance!

Hey, I'm all for the smell it leaves my fingertips in for tomorrow morning's class!

Coinciding with the durian season (anniversary of the blog?), the bak chang (glutinous rice dumpling) festival is here. Well, not exactly the festival by itself. More like the Dragon Boat Festival celebrated with the traditional bak chang - steamed glutinous rice dumplings wrapped in bamboo leaves along with ingredients like duck eggs' yolk, assorted beans and nuts and pork. Growing up, I've seen both my grandmothers making bak changs when the time arrives despite the fact that one of them is a Catholic who makes them for pleasure while the other makes them for deity worships and such. Well, that was before amah moved from her old pre-war houses to the current 2 bedroom economical flat where space constrains and old age seems to be catching up real quick with her. Used to love the smell of bak changs steaming greeting my nostrils when I was younger and when amah made them in huge amounts for eating and praying. Poh poh on the other hand, paid more attention to kee changs (another type of chang) - yellow colored glutinous rice wrapped in bamboo leaves too minus the fillings and only eaten when dipped in homemade black syrup. Poh poh does make bak changs also but not as many as amah's.

Plenty of 'em!

Well, one thing that's peculiar about me which shows when it comes to bak changs is that I only eat the ones that are made especially for me. I'm sure I have other peculiar habits but let's save those for another day. As written in my profile, I don't take greens, any forms of greens, beans included and considering that bak changs come with a lot of beans, I've almost taken an oathe to swear off bak changs completely in my consumption list when I was a kid. Still not wanting to part with the texture of glutinous rice, I suggested that amah only inserted pork in the bak changs, one day while I was squatting by her side watching her insert the fillings and later wrapping the bak changs with the bamboo leaves and securing them with strings (aquired from dried fibre of banana shoots) with such ease and speed before hanging them in bunches over a long horizontal stick to be steamed. She took my suggestion and made 10 bak changs for me the following year. 10 was a large amount then, seeing that I could only manage at least one at a given time since glutinous rice can be rather filling.

Bundled in a bunch!

Ever since then, I'll get 10 bak changs made especially for me, only filled with pork, from amah. Sometimes, even with extra pork.

At least that was the way it was before she was incapable of anything more than making back and forth trips from the living room to the kitchen. It's been so long since. Now, poh poh has taken the honours of making those annual 10 pork-only bak changs for me. In a way, I do feel special, considering that poh poh only cutom makes those changs for me out of the 14 grandhcildren she has. Amah was different as Grace and I were her only paternal grandchildren then (before Edmund showed up) and Grace was a non-fussy eater. Poh poh even has ming tied in different coloured strings and hung in a different place of the kitchen, afraid that someone else might accidentally take mine. Pity the person who has to eat a pork-only chang, that's for one, but me getting angry that my precious chang was stolen, now that's another thing! I guess I was a spoilt brat in this matter, aren't I? Still, after one incident of stolen chang (I think there were tears involved!), poh poh was forever careful with mine ever since. But things have definitely changed for the better. I do occasionally take the "real" bak changs, only picking up the pork and passing the other filling to someone else and now it takes at least more than a good 3 bak changs to get me full.

Which pretty much explains my size if you put the durians and the dumplings together.

I can already see the needle in the weighing machine tilting more to the right now.

Superb Sweet Seventeen.

Ever since Queensbay Mall opened in Penang, the already mall-crowded island, back in December, I've been dying to try out the latest Thank God It's Friday (T.G.I.F) outlet that was opened along with the mall, located at the right wing entrance of the mall. Of course, the red-bricked wall and the red and white awnings (signature colors of T.G.I.F), plus the huge sign which decorated the exterior of the restaurant sparked my interest on my first visit to the mall. It even got Grace and I occasionally ooh-ing and aah-ing at the mere mention of T.G.I.F. Plenty of times we've tried entering the restaurant but it was usually fully occupied or that we were broke after a day long of tiring shopping. That usually leaves us relentlessly walking away to look for McD instead, after flipping through the menu depicting scrumptious food on the stand at the restaurant entrance.

Considering that it's been so long since I wanted to try T.G.I.F and the simple fact that it has been a while since the last time the family had a fancy dine at a fancy restaurant, I jumped at the opportunity and made reservations for eight all by myself, which included me looking for a number online and in the telephone directories (a.k.a Yellow Pages) which proved futile when I had to call the mall up and asked for a number. It's 04-6413363, by the way. Trust me, you'll need it, seeing the fact that one can barely get a seat on weekends without prior reservations. After all, it was my birthday on Monday (11/6) and being in this family, your birthday treat, your choice - a tradition of some sort. Nothing to extravagant though. For me, it's usually restaurant visits like this. Hey, birthdays and Christmas seem to be the only logical reasons for mom and dad to fork out extra cash from their daily budget.



I decided I have to try T.G.I.F out no matter what. To be honest, I was more eager to check the condition out for myself rather than believing in what others say cause I've read a few unfavorable critiques towards the restaurant in various blogs where I'd go, it couldn't be that bad! Oh, I was quite unsure myself when I suggested the place but upon entering and checking the menu out, it was everything I imagined it to be - even more. The setting was cozy, warm, inviting and delightful, not to mention with the little vintage look thrown in, like the big black and white picture of Elvis Presley and a very old Superman comic cover hung over the walls while figurines of Batman and some other old thingamajigs decorated the shelves. The music was soothing, which suited the setting and the lighting were a soft glow, inviting peers from outsiders through the glass windows. Typically western, I thought to myself. And then I spotted the huge KITCHEN sign lighted in bulbs when being led to our seats, giving the entire 60's look a complete touch, making me hum the tune of Christina Aguilera's Candyman to myself.

Flipping through the menu was already tempting enough to get me drooling while the waiter introduced his humble self to dad, sitting at the opposite end of the table. Everything looked so delicious and it was hard for a fickle minded person like me who, if it was possible, to try everything on the menu (greedy, I know!). We waited for ah jiu and jiu mu (notice the new title for ah jiu's wife) whom we invited earlier when making reservations while taking a relatively long time to make up our minds, flipping the menu over and over again, going through the description for multiple times. It was almost 9p.m. when ah jiu and jiu mu arrived and all the dishes were served. I ordered the Texas Ribs while Grace had Friday's Burger, Edmund with the Spaghetti from the Kiddies' Menu, dad with the Jack Daniel's Shrimp and Ribs, mom with Half Roast Chicken, aka with Chicken Fingers, ah jiu with a Whole Rib which looked beastly with the rib bones jutting out and jiu mu with Grilled Salmon.

To Grace's surprise, the portion served by T.G.I.F was way huger than she feared it might be. The picture above pretty much speaks for itself. That was even managed with the other side of the burger hidden in her palm! The food looked so fabulously delectable that it was a great feat for me to keep my saliva from escaping the corners of my mouth everytime I spoke. My hands were shaking, probably due to the hunger, (or should I say, desire to devour the food!) hence, the blurred photos and from the shaky hands and the over-pumped ISO, explaining the noise.My pictures don't do any justice to the real thing, really. Forgive me but food photography is undoubtedly an area which I'm weak at. Thankfully, given the size of the servings, no food was wasted at the end of the dinner - everyone took a fair bite out of Grace's burger to help the poor girl finish while jiu mu cleverly divided her salmon to everyone at the beginning of dinner. Speaking of the new member of the family, she surprisingly bought a cake for the occasion - a green jelly cake, that is, bringing memories of the past when I once had this cake. Truly and old time favorite cake of mine.




And who else is there better to celebrate your birthday with if not with the family? Or at least, that's what I think. Obviously not the gregarious sort who fancies night clubs and mindless drinking with friends. At least, not yet, I hope. Akak was there, so was the newlywed couple. Mom decided to give them a break with a hearty meal after all that wedding massacre that took place over the weekend, so mom invited them. I realize, there's still a lot more gaps to fill up (oh, the explanation I owe!) but at the moment, I'm putting this first as I've promised to the T.G.I.F crew there in the little note I've left them with. What I didn't mention was that the crew did an amazing job in throwing a little celebration for me when the cake was brought out - there were the songs and other paraphernalia - that made the whole day a memorable one. That definitely was the cherry on the icing for me. Just check it out in the video below. In short, the service was excellent, the food great and the ambiance lovely. Definitely defied the not-so-good feedback that I've read so far.



Now, doesn't that make you wanna have your birthday there? Another satisfied customer, I'd say!

Pictorial Update.

The examinations are finally over and I'm back! I know, I've got to get the momentum of blogging back but as I've mentioned, wedding arrangements are a pain in the butt for me currently. Anyway, here are some pictorial update about a few stuff that happened in the duration of the three weeks when I was away. Chew on them.

Yeah, as you can see, dad's car's window got smashed as a failed attempt of robbery. Some bastard tried breaking in into the car after we left the goldsmith. Dad's guess was that we were unaware of being trailed since we left the goldsmith's and went for lunch, instead of going home straightaway. That Saturday, we were at the goldsmith shopping for wedding rings and wedding gifts of bracelets, bangles, rings and necklaces as the Chinese see gold items as auspicious items to have during weddings and such. We spent the entire morning there with the soon-to-be-wed couple and it wouldn't be any surprise that robbers might have their eyes on us, seeing that mom and dad did make quite a number of trips in and out of the shop "depositing" their valuables in the car. There was about RM9k worth of gold, if I'm not mistaken and we'd thought it would be safer leaving it in the car rather than taking it with us and risk it being snatched. Silly us.

Of course, dad was pissed when I alerted him that his window was smashed upon entering the vehicle while mom was more frantic checking that everything was still in place. Fortunately, the thief didn't succeed in breaking in (dad credits his security alarm!) and we didn't lose anything, except another few hundred bucks to replace the window. Dad immediately proceeded to the mechanic to get it fixed while we got a ride home with ah chiu was was still around town at that time. For me, seeing the car window cracked into a million pieces was a pretty new sight that I had to take pictures. I won't deny it either, that I was terrified that things like that could really happen. I've always thought it only happens in chain-mails circulating around locals. Kinda got mom and me thinking about the possibilities of us being followed into the home and so on. Wouldn't that be scary? Either way, that definitely got us alerter in future trips to the goldsmith. Preys are all over the place.





As I've said, most of the weekends that are left before the big day arrives are dedicated to any unfinished business in preparation for the wedding. That weekend after the horrifying visit to the goldsmith, on Sunday, mom and I got to tag along with the couple to their wedding album photoshoot. There were the studio and outdoor sessions, both of which I was there for, resulting me in skipping the school's annual Sport's Day. Spent the entire morning in the studio, helping ah chiu put on various costumes and didn't dare taking any photos. I mean, I didn't want to face the awkward moment in a confined place when the people in the studio tells me to put the camera away. I did manage to pull the camera out when we went outdoor. Three locations were all that was offered in the package that the couple chose, the beach, the church and the temple. Ah chiu's Catholic while the wife isn't, thus the contrasting locations.

Nonetheless, it was a lovely experience. It was easy shooting models that already have make-up on and didn't require me telling them how to pose (the real photographer did that already!). Still, the lighting and the angling was a bit of a challenge since I wasn't keen on getting in the way of the photographer. All I did was shoot from any points I could grab on. Though, I have to say, I thought the photographer was a little flat. I wasn't expecting KidChan Studios material but personally, I still felt the whole shoot was a little blunt - the locations, the poses, the backdrops and the outfits. A little dead, I thought, almost routine-like. I won't elaborate further but I wouldn't recommend it to any couple who don't mind spending that little extra for their wedding album. Understandably, ah chiu is on a rather tight budget. However, being on the set with working photographers as such definitely sparked ideas of my own. Imagine me having my own studio and doing what I love best. Well, I have my hopes up.

Later that week too, the family attended Carina and Adrian's birthday party by the beach on Labour Day. Grace came back on that day and we were just in time to pick her up from the bus depot and headed down to the beach. They decided to share the cake at the last minute, despite the fact that their actual birthdays are actually a month a part. I guess I was wrong about Adrian, he couldn't resist the lavish celebration after all. They both had their friends over (for the night as well, I suppose) and they threw a barbecue, cooked spaghetti and ordered extra food. As I've heard, their grandma rented two separate rooms for the both of them! Definitely nothing like the modest beach party I had, celebrating my 16th birthday last year! My, they sure do know how to be impressive. By the way, the baby in the pictures is Amelia, the youngest cousin of the family. Certainly have grown bigger since the last time we saw her in October!


Before I finish this up, here is a picture of Twitty, as I've promised huiwen7 a few weeks back (sorry this is a little late, Hui Wen!). If I'm not wrong, this was Twitty during the 2nd week it was with us. That's akak's hand balancing the bird on the ball. That time, Twitty was only beginning to learn to curve its feet around circular poles like a mop stick. This time, we were actually quite successful in keeping a pet. I mean, we managed to kept it alive and witnessed it grow. By the end of the 3rd week, Twitty was beginning to flap its wings. Entering the 4th week, it was already flying (literally!) out of the cardboard box whenever we opened it to feed it. It really developed black beautiful wings and was already able to have a firm grip around my finger. Everything was fine until one day when mom decided to give Twitty a bath by sprinkling water over it, seeing that its feet and feathers were filthy with dropping stains. Mom left it out on the balcony for it to shake itself dry before discovering that the bird's already flown away! LOL.

Initially, it did cause a mini search party with mom and akak searching for the bird high and low around the vicinity but they gave up not before long, realising the fact that birds do need their freedom after all. It was also uneasy at first to adjust to the silence in the house, without the chirping and all but that's easily replaced with music. Akak and mom refused to remove the empty cardboard box and the used containers on the first few days, hoping that it'll one day fly back to its loft. It never happened and no one knows where is it now. Thankfully, we haven't reached the investment period yet, where we buy bird cage and bird foods. Dad has already started mentioning a few days before it flew away.

Usual Updates.

Whoa! Would you look at the last time I since blogged! It's been a while hasn't it? I've never taken such a long break/hiatus before and it's pretty scary to me. There's this inexplicable weight over my shoulder that just seems to can't go away. what with knowing the rest of the world's been updating their blogs daily while mine remains dormant without any notice. But it definitely surprised me that there were a couple of people who still visited the blog even without updates or anything and leaving little notes on the tagbox. That's nice to know. That's not all. I've been pretty much inactive at Flickr too. No pictorial updates or whatsoever and it kills me to take a few minutes of every day to browse through the amazing shots of my Flickr contacts.

Well, ever since my last post, things were pretty chaotic in my life. With the long-awaited wedding coming by just around the corner, I was really busy with the wedding mass booklet cover and arrangements. Dedicated all of my time fiddling with Photoshop and Microsoft Word - and you know how slow it gets with my computer running these two programs simultaneously! Work didn't speed up much even with Grace's laptop around as she didn't have a printer and only I had extra fonts on my computer. We were practically transferring files from my computer to hers and vice versa. I bore with it, though, having ah chiu and the parish priest himself approve of the cover I "designed". Weekends were usually reserved for the soon-to-wed couple, running them through the updates of the wedding. As the official wedding planner's son, I get to go along with them on their bridal photoshoot and stuff like that. Which could get pretty interesting, if you ask me, not to mention, sparking ideas of my own studio in the future.

Ooh, this is such a mess!

Although, credit goes to mom and Grace for the contents of the booklet, which both of them took the time to type out and arranged it for a proper printing. Mom is still busy with last minute arrangements like the church organist, florist, caterers and the wedding day agenda. Practically don't have time to go shopping to look for a decent dress for the occasion herself. Of course, that haven't included all the yells and screams of disapproval on all sorts of things from various parties that mom had to counter all by herself. In layman's terms, the feared catfights are already taking place sooner than I thought it would among her siblings already. Virtual misconceptions, misunderstandings and wrong judgements are just a few causes that can spark the well-kept fire inside of everyone. Thank God there was still a decent amount of toleration in the family. I wonder what would happen when the siblings actually meet up in person. Hair-pulling and bitch-slapping, maybe?

Anyway, this weekend, mom, Grace and apoh will be accompanying the couple down to Pahang, the hometown of the bride for wedding dowries. Yeap, it's still a well practiced tradition here, complete with traditional baskets and various types of delicacies, one of each bearing their own significance to the Chinese wedding. The couple wanted to keep the ceremony at a low-down as it was only a small occasion with no frivolous celebration with kegs of beer till the wee hours. It was basically carried out due to the importance it had in Chinese customs and as much as I've heard, the bride's family would only be holding a small buffet with close friends and families. They'll be spending a couple of nights there before embarking on a cruel 8hours journey home. Initially, I wanted to go but since I still have my exams going on, the spot goes to Grace. I'd happily skip exams but mom forbade. No surprise there. Dad, Edmund and me? What's the worst that could happen?

Speaking of which, exams were dropped on me like a bomb. It started last Thursday and you can pretty easily guess how busy I am juggling between exams and wedding works. Oh, the exams are the usual blank-paper hand-ups and head-tucked-in-folded-arms-on-the-table routine. Nothing out of the ordinary since I barely threw in any effort before the exams. I mean, this examination was kinda screwed up anyway. Just imagine, things were so messed up that the school couldn't decide on one simple timetable for the exams, thus having it changed for 5 ridiculous times, leaving students like me in a daze of when the exams were actually going to start. There were days where the timetable says the 1st paper for the day will start at 7.30am but when I get to school, I get people telling it to my face that it doesn't start till 8.10am, which really sucks.

Which is why I can't be less than bothered about this mid-term examinations. Yea, I get it, that there are going to be prizes for the highest scorer at the end of the year but that's just not me. Walking up the stage receiving prizes can be scary after all. Undoubtedly, I still do get cold feet every single day before exams start. It's inevitable. It's just practical for me to suck up as much as I could a few minutes before exams start, mindlessly flipping through the pages and scanning them through at the speed of light. Not like that's going to help in the exams but at least it calms me down a little and saves me from the ache of watching the others answer steadily while I doodle on the blank areas of the paper and the table. Pathetic ain't it? I don't think any other teenager my age goes through the same shit I do. Either way, another one of the many screwed up exams to add to my string of bad achievements. Not like the near-permanent mess in the room doesnt give me enough headache already.

So, there you have it, me explaining my absence for the past 3 weeks. Even as I'm posting this, I'm still busy meddling about the booklet's content placing and getting it ready for print. Of course, I'm using Grace's laptop side by side with my computer, multi-tasking my hands off, or God knows when I'll be able to finish! For now, I can't really say if things are going to get any better - any less chaotic, that is. There's still a lot more to be done in preparation for the wedding and I'm guessing that things will probably get more tensed as the date approaches. Grace has been back for a 2 months varsity break since 1st May and with her around, there'll be more shopping and mall-roaming, hunting down for the best bargains and possibly shopping for the big day. The woman needs her shoes, her accessories, her dresses and her bags! I don't think she'll let me off easily, considering that my mid-term holidays are just around the corner as well (oh, some good news at last!).

Still, not that I'm complaining that it's a pain in the butt to go shopping. Damn, it can be a relief, to say the least.