Physical Education.

Everyone I know knows that I'm neither a sportsman nor am I a sport lover. I attend school every Thursday reluctantly. I have Physical Education (PE) on Thursdays. The first thing in morning. I'm not much of a player given that my (body) size is as such or the other way round. I'm not a big fan of SWEATing either. Especially not at the right time.

My point is, if I was dressed to sweat, then I'd be more than happy to go sweat myself out like a rat runnning on the wheel of its cage. It's not only the matter of dressing. Time and place comes into a hell of a consideration if I'd wanted to sweat. Picture this :

If I was going to attend an important function at the one of those high-class hotels that poor people like me will never afford to even park my vehicle around its premises. Dressed to impress and I realised that I've left the car keys on the dining table of my 3-bedroom apartment as I searched frantically for it in my pockets in front of my old battered Nissan. With perfect hair (not that I have any now) and the sleek and coolness of the guy we see in perfume ads, I'd have to turn back and run up to my apartment situated at the toppest floor (about 5th floor) of the building to get them. Knowing that I'm already late and being the heavy sweater as I am, I still had to go through all the process of opening all the doors which accumulates to three locks of my well-secured apartment to retrieve my car keys. By the time I manage to lock the numerous locks of my home, and got into the car after running through exactly 20 flights of steps (back and forth) I'm already desperately trying to wipe my sweat off which is dripping off my forehead and neck like nobody's business with the handkerchief that I had earlier in my pocket. Having a car with broken air conditioning, I'd be as wet as the pool by the time I got myself into the hotel Grand Ballroom.

That was totally my imagination. But it relates to my condition. It usually happens when I'm going out with family or friends when I'm dressed to NOT sweat but to only find that I've left something back home and that I'll have to run quite a distance to get that thing. And I really sweat easily. As easy as drinking water. Little actions I take when I'm not prepared for it - like when I'm sipping a can of Coke while chatting with a friend in the comforts of the air-cond in the living room of the host's house and I suddenly get called to help carry the chairs to the front yard at a friend's barbeque party - will only result me to sweat heavily and I'd be all squirmy and uncomfortable throughout the whole party. And I don't like that. Keep this between you and me, I'll always walk away from a scene whenever such a thing comes up and I'll save myself from all the trouble.

Back to Physical Education. Same situation. I go to school with fresh ironed shirts and pants and not a drip of sweat, hoping that it'll stay that way throughout the whole day so that I could study comfortably, it never does. On normal days, it's just inner sweat (sweating under the shirt) and it's not visible through the thin layer of school uniform I put on cause there's always a wife beater when I wear a shirt. Some people in school really sweat and they're shirt just sticks onto their body making everything almost see-through, which is so unhygienic and disgusting to me. if one has a really muscular body, then it's fine if they prefer to show off. But some people just don't realise themselves and just sweat like those jocks do, to only expose themselves off their excess flesh. I on the other hand am very self-conscious at stuff like that.

PE was just one of the activities that gets me all worried about sweating again. See, don't get me wrong that I hate to sweat, but I need a proper place and time if I would like to sweat. Let's just say I'm even picky when it comes to sweating. PE wasn't one of the places or times in my list. I'll usually skip PE with the excuse of not bringing my attire or that I'm not feeling well. Or better still, I just skip school for the whole day! LOL. So far, everytime I skipped PE is still smooth-sailing cause I gave in my exemption letter from outdoor activities at the start of the school term. He's pretty edge-y about me not bringing my attire all the time. Don't know when he might blow up! I'm taking my chances.

I can't say that it's entirely my fault that I refuse to attend any PE. To me, it wouldn't be such a big deal for me to sweat as much as possible during that one and a half hour of PE at school IF the school was to actually have something called locker rooms. A place where people could actually bathe and change into comfy clothes. Well, if it's one thing about privacy, we don't need to leave all the bathing area (or whatever you call it) opened like in the movies. I definitely wouldn't hesitate to attend PE. I mean, I get to clean and wash up after a whole lot of sweating and get back to class feeling the way I felt before PE. That shouldn't be a problem with me! It'd be much better than what we're doing now.

Changing in class, with your pants down while your sweat isn't giving up on dripping into your left eye and you try to wipe it off with a hand when another one is still holding your pants that's half way down your knee to save you the embarrasment of showing everything to passer by outside of the class. That sucks. Not to mention when you have to open your shirt to reveal excessive fat in your body while you have your quite little thought that noone will care only to have someone jeer and the whole class cracks into jokes to discriminate you and your fatness. Oh my, that was what I went through. I might as well don't attend PE to save me all this trouble.

But so far, I'm still not fond of sweating in the midst of doing something inappropriate to sweat. And I'm still looking forward to skip the next PE lesson. I'd sign myself up with agym just for sweating if I really need it. Don't push me into sweating!